Did You Know There's Good Types of Anger? “A man who is intimate with his anger and who can express it skillfully is a man in whom forcefulness coexists with vulnerability and compassion, a man worthy of our trust, a man capable of deep intimacy.” ~Robert Augustus Masters Anger is not the problem. Anger is a vital tool. It’s what you do with your anger that becomes problematic. It’s your response to anger that makes it healthy or not. Anger can be a tool toward leveraging courage into your life or it can be a weapon that violently destroys everything. It can be a fire that makes you stronger or it can be a fire that consumes you. The worst thing you can do is repress your anger. Repressed anger almost always comes back as a chaotic inner-demon. The best thing you can do is embrace your anger in the moment. Sit at the feet of it and learn what it must teach. Then proactively transform that information into a healthy response. Here are four types of healthy anger that will help you do precisely that. 1.) Compassionate Anger “Research indicates that when we’re angry at others, we aim for retaliation or revenge. But when we’re angry forothers, we seek out justice and a better system. We don’t just want to punish; we want to help.” ~Adam Grant Compassionate anger is all about seeking justice for a better system. Not only for yourself but for others as well. It’s a deep understanding that everything is connected, and an even deeper understanding that your anger is a healthy response toward injustice. A sound strategy for channeling your anger is to focus on ways in which you can use it to help rather than punish others. Rather than violent, offensive acts of vengeful anger for the satisfaction of your ego; practice nonviolent, defensive acts of compassionate anger for a cause greater than yourself. Self-defense and the defense of others less capable is subsumed by compassionate anger. Compassionate anger for a cause greater than yourself is the epitome of transforming fire into fuel. It takes the raw fire of your fierce passion and turns it into focused fuel that will give you the courage and fierceness needed to act for the good of the whole. 2.) Vulnerable Anger “To be human is necessarily to be a vulnerable risk-taker; to be a courageous human is to be good at it.” ~Jonathan Lear Anger that feigns invulnerability is reactive and inauthentic. It’s locked down and divisive. There’s no intimacy. There’s no connection between cause and effect, between healthy and unhealthy. This type of anger is all surface. It’s volatile and irrational, congealed wrath and repressed rage. Typically associated with a narrow-minded, codependent mindset. Vulnerable anger, on the other hand, is a deep intimacy with anger. It’s authentic and beholden to cause and effect. It’s soft and malleable, resilient and robust. It’s transformative. There’s an emotional flexibility that is tantamount to alchemy. Typically [...]
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