Divorce can be a difficult and emotional experience for the entire family, as it shakes up household dynamics. One of your biggest worries is likely how this significant life change will affect your children. However, with proper communication and understanding, you can continue raising a happy child after divorce.

Establish a Routine

While some changes to the current schedule might be inevitable due to circumstances, try to maintain as much consistency as possible. For example, if your child participates in extracurricular activities, make sure they continue. Maintaining this may include establishing a schedule with your co-parent or asking loved ones to help with transportation.

Remember, your goal is to minimize the impact of divorce on your child’s daily life. Having a predictable routine provides a sense of security and helps them navigate this difficult period.

Never Put Them in the Middle

Never involve your child in any conflict or disagreement between you and your ex-spouse. Don’t force them to pick sides or witness arguments. You should remain neutral if you and your ex had a bad split and no longer get along. In instances where you don’t have anything nice to say about your ex, don’t say anything at all.

Additionally, badmouthing your ex around your child puts them in an uncomfortable position, making them feel forced to take sides. This can cause unnecessary stress and anxiety for your child.

Maintain a Healthy Co-Parenting Relationship

While you may no longer be partners, you will forever be parents to your child. When creating a co-parenting relationship that works for you, always be honest with your ex-spouse.

The court may award 50/50 legal and physical custody, which means you both have an equal say in major decisions and spend equal time with your child. Healthy communication with your co-parent minimizes confusion and prevents disputes on schooling, medical decisions, or visitation.

While you don’t have to be friends with your ex, strive to show respect and honesty. If it’s hard, consider treating your ex like a colleague and maintaining professionalism for the sake of your child.

Openly Communicate With Your Kids

The final way to continue raising a happy child after divorce is to communicate openly and honestly with them. Conversations should be age-appropriate and empathetic. Encourage them to express their feelings and reassure them that feeling upset or confused is OK.

Having parents split up is a significant change, and transitioning between two homes can be overwhelming for a child. Regular check-ins can help you gauge how your child is coping with the changes; additionally, remind your child that they can talk to you about anything. With your patience, love, and understanding, your child will continue to feel supported as you navigate this new life together.