There are some happy couples who stay together for 20 years and more. Then there are couples who last only 5 minutes together because of a Facebook post.

Makes you wonder why can’t a couple in a relationship stay together for years nowadays. I’m sure you’re not the only one who questions  the secrets of happy couples who stay married for years? This post will give you the insight of many healthy and happy relationships lasting 20 years!


Happy Couples Secret 1: Trust







Sure there’s a temptation to go through your partner’s phone as they sleep next to you. Before you put your detective hat on, stop yourself. It’s not worth fighting over what’s on their phone. Remember, curiosity killed the cat.

Every time you want to snoop around, think of this old saying. Besides you have to trust your partner. You can’t build a relationship if there’s no trust.


Happy Couples Secret 2: Communication







When you and your partner get into a fight what happens? Do you both runoff and swear to never talk to each other ever again?

If you want to make your relationship work, then you have to learn how to communicate. Let’s not forget that active listening skills are a part of communication too.

Take the time to listen to what your partner is saying to you. Don’t wait until an argument to use your active listening skills. Your partner will tell you what they want from you if you take the time to listen through everyday conversation.


Happy Couples Secret 3: Affection







Showing affection to your partner is as important as communicating. How else do you think happy couples stay in love? Affection doesn’t have to be sexual.

Unhappy couples think all physical touches have to lend to sex and when there’s no they avoid it. Happy couples know affection is a must!

  • Snuggle
  • Kiss on the check
  • Rub on the shoulders
  • Communicate and listen
  • Let them know they were on your mind
  • Holding hands

Simple actions like these are a great way to show affection if you don’t know-how. Happy couples know showing affection creates a sense of harmony. It’s the little things that matter the most.


Happy Couples Secret 4: Respect







Happy couples respect their partner’s space and them as a person. Treat your partner how you would like to be. Think about it, don’t you want someone who:

  • Listen to your needs and wants
  • Communicate openly to you
  • Speak kindly of you
  • Help build your self-esteem up

This is how respect looks like in a healthy relationship. Respect your partner and don’t take them for granted.


Happy Couples Secret 5: Own Identity







Spending 24/ 7  with your loved one is a bad idea. You need some time apart and your separate identity.

It’s ok to share common interests and views together. This is what made you and your partner close. Though you should have a hobby, friend, or family member separate from your partner.

Stand out from your partner and let your personality shine without them.


Happy Couples Secret 6: Quality Time







Being around each other and spending quality time is not the same. If you and your partner are staring into the phones while next to each other. It is not quality time.

Quality time is a chance to communicate and keep the connection strong. Often couples forget this and think because they spent 5 minutes together is enough.

Couples who spend quality time together are more likely to stay in a happy and healthy relationship. Go beyond and above for your partner to make them feel appreciated. Make the date night special and put the electronics away.


Happy Couples Secret 7:  Have Fun Together







Happy couples that stay together for years know how important laughter is within the relationship. They laugh through the good times and storms.

The next time you and your partner need to reconnect try these ideas.

  • Working out
  • Movie night
  • Game night
  • Cook meals together
  • Try a new restaurant
  • Do a weekend getaway


Having fun together will keep the satisfaction of the relationship alive. You’ll be able to communicate better and face challenges in a positive light.